(no subject)

Two things, make-up companies, two things.

1. I am not that pale, and it alarms me that I am so often falling on the "fairest of the fair" side of the spectrum*. What am I, some kind of secret princess, with skin as white as milk**? Where's my damsel foundation?

2. Not all pale people have pink complexions. Crazy idea, I know, but bear with me. Some of us actually have yellow undertones. If Chanel can supply me with the exactly correct color the first go around, I expect the lot of you to be able to comprehend that we exist. Or maybe that some fair people need a yellow or green tone to neutralize our frequently pink faces. That's not our natural color, that means we have capillaries and our skin is being oxygenated. I thought you people were supposed to be experts.

MOAR YELLOW FOR DAMSELS, PLS.

*This just doesn't make sense, because a lot of people I meet wear a make-up that I can only describe as ghostly white. Where do they get it? Are they cutting it with talc?

**I've always been kind of grossed out by this when I see it in books. I understand that it's mostly achieved with a powder, likely of a lead base, but... but eek! The only people who make it look good are the geisha.

On that note, I actually have no idea how to pick color until I slather it all over my face. Even just a few smudges look right until I try to wear it, and then it looks like I've had a tragic self-tanning mishap. I'll look at something and go "too pink!" and the lady at the Clarins counter tuts and says, "too yellow!" It doesn't matter how I squint or look at it, I don't see any of this alleged not-pink. It looks pretty darn peach-like to me.