I Saw Cloverfield

I saw a comment in a post with a clip from Cloverfield that had people exploding with a satisfying sploosh, so I said to my horror aficionado friend "I should see Cloverfield." "It was bad. Why do you want to watch it?" "I saw people exploding. That clip made me want to see it more than any of the other promos."

So I watched it. The shaky cam didn't bother me as much as shaky cam in theatrical releases, possibly because I've seen lots of cellphone vid coverage of major events and am used to it. What I couldn't figure out was: this guy was documenting everything. Why doesn't he have a GoPro? If bicyclists can helmet-mount GoPros to document how stupid car drivers are, why can't this guy who wants to see everything get one and rid himself of the shaky cam and get better video?

"What's a GoPro?" Pocket Healer asked.

"It's... you know... any time you see a video. It's a GoPro. Like when someone's got one on a helmet."

See? A GoPro for all occasions.

Anyway, the movie was actually kind of satisfying for what it was, but maybe that has something to do with this:

Me: sure, gonna finish this durarara ep and watch it
9:46 PM of course if the movie is as boring as the first five minutes I'm gonna go back to durarara
9:47 PM 'cause even the exploding bite thing was a little dull, but I'm curious
/skips 20 minutes in
9:49 PM I can't wait to watch all these people die.
I have watched 3 minutes of this total
Pocket Healer: hahahahaha
ilu
Me: I skipped to 5 minutes and the dude was talking about the sky, 24 minutes and it looks like shit blew up, went back to 16 and annoying people are talking about sleeping together
9:51 PM and I'm like "gosh it's all the people I hated in college."
YAY THEY'RE SCREAMING
damn now they're assuring each other
...well his camera sucks but suddenly he gets HD fireballs. I'll forgive this lack of realism for fireballs

Me: so they're all crying that somebody died
and I srsly went "but he's standing right there?"
there were apparently TWO douchebro white dudes
I didn't know
10:04 PM (I guess it was the cool one and I'm stuck with Mr. Japan?)
Pocket Healer: douchebro white dudes are all quite similar
Me: omg are you serious all the looters are black?
like srsly you couldn't go "dear kajillion extras, some of y'all come loot" you hired special black looters?


Me: "one of us is gonna have to tackle you and it's gonna be uncomfortable for all involved" no homo tho lol
that would be uncomfortable for me. they're such douchebros. :(
Pocket Healer: mm, tackling people of the same gender in a time of crisis, bb.
Me: if they come together the douchebroness will be overwhelming
and they will make douchebro babies

I apparently really hated everyone? Except the one that exploded. And possibly the white guy that died that I thought was one guy until he turned out to be two guys, and the one that lived was the more annoying half of this indistinguishable douchebro amoeba.