On Thor, And How No One Has Taste

A post is made to io9 about why Thor didn't do well with the under-25 set*, which I won't link to because FUCK YOU GAWKER. Basically there's a lot of blah blah blah, kids don't know Kenneth Brannagh or appreciate the amazing cast**. Blah blah, kids don't know Thor (coming back to this point), and so on. Thor doesn't have a cartoon that kids would be familiar with. The trailers looked boring. Unemployment is rampant in that demographic and they don't have disposable income. So on and so on, until I raised my eyebrows and went "uh, it's finals? When will someone say the obvious and point out that it's finals?"

But it was the comments that made me stop short and reminded me that, Sammy girl, go back to the girly nerd spaces because the nerd world at large isn't for you. Not just because it's anti-girl, but because so many boy nerds have no taste. Sorry, boy nerds reading this, realize that you are not of the "so many" generalization.

I saw comments that basically got summed up like this: "Thor is the weakest of Marvel's big 3." I frowned, trying to think of the others. Who do I like to read from Marvel? I used to read way more Marvel than DC, for my X-Men fix, but... who else? "I like Birds of Prey-- no, that's DC. Oh, what about-- no, Vertigo. Dark Horse. Oh hey! Blue Beetle! ...That's DC again. Oh. Uh, the Pet Avengers story was cool, at least. But I don't think Pet Avengers is top three."

"Iron Man and Cap," the comment went on, and I would've done a spit-take if, you know, those sorts of things actually happened.

Iron Man!? People actually read the snoozefest Iron Man comic!? (I lie, I don't know how much of a snoozefest it is because I really only read Iron Man in the ensemble cast context, but when it's Iron Man being... Iron Man I lose interest fast). I skim those posts on scans_daily and there's really nothing in there that piques my interest. Cap is okay, especially okay right now as I am loving Steve's adorable one-shot about his first time as Cap cause omg there is nothing I do not love about this why is it just a one-shot, must we really returned to our regularly scheduled meh? Well, shit.

But even that pales in comparison to the awesome that is kid!Loki (witness, exhibit#1 and exhibit#2 THE DANCING aaaaaah so dead). Seriously, from Marvel, all I really read is X-Men and Thor, so the idea that he's the weakest is further reminder that 1) the average person has no taste, and 2) I am really not at all the target market for... anything. I am a tiny anomaly, floating far and away from the usual target demographics (I am not male, under 25, and I want pretty art and good story). But still, the idea that the two heroes I typically avoid are the big guys just-- what!? WHAT? Even in DC I'll read the Big 3. I'm picky but not that picky.

Still... am I really that unusual?

Granted, I realize that I split up most of my Thor reading into "times where Loki is awesome, or there is lots of Warrior 3 awesome." So I am not a Thor fan inasmuch as I am an "everyone else from Asgard" fan. This could be why, during the movie, I was so bored with Jane&co but was so excited to see the other Asgardians show up. I mean, blah blah blah stuff Natalie Portman being boring blah blah "oh look we're back in Asgard so pretty, yay!"

Other comments told me how unusual I was for this. "My friend observed that comic readers tend to want Thor to return to Asgard faster, those who don't want him to get out of it faster."

Wait, what? People wanted less Asgard time? But-- but look at it! That's how you build a fantasy city! Thor is far and away the most beautiful movie I've seen in forever, and people want less awesome architecture!? H-how!? THE ARCHITECTURE IS SO AMAZING LOOK AT IT. Big, panning, wide screen shots! And, and-- unf. This is how you're supposed to use your imagination, guys. Now if we could just ditch the shaky cam... (why is it so necessary to make your audience think your camera man has the DTs? Good for you, giving an ex-alcoholic a job, but can you, I don't know, mount the camera on a tripod? Please?)

In sum: make movies for me, Hollywood. I'll go see them. And forget guys under 25, they have no taste. I, however, have plenty of disposable income, mostly because no industry ever targets people like me, so I can't buy clothes, shoes, purses, make-up, soap, or anything else teehee silly girls waste their money on. Anyway, Thor made $66 million this weekend, so doesn't that suggest that maybe you don't need to dudes under 25 crowd to make money?

*It still pisses me off that this matters, because it's a huge part of why America doesn't get good movies (also the fact that Americans are dumb, and made dumber because they go to movies to "turn their brains off," in the words of my family). This summer run is unusual for me in that there's several movies I'm interested in-- Pirates, Green Lantern (more interested in Emerald Knights though, mostly for Nathan Fillion because otherwise yaaaaaawn Hal Jordon I hate you so much), Cowboys vs. Aliens, and the new Guillermo del Toro movie. Typically I go months without seeing a movie and not feeling like I missed anything. Heck, half the movies I go to are at my mother's behest, and I'm kind of "meh" about it all. Animated films tend to be the best for me, because they have more attention to story-telling than live action films (my mother doesn't go see dramas, and most dramas that come out in mainstream theaters blow goats I SAID IT COME AT ME).

**NGL, I was way more intrigued by Idris Elba as Heimdall and smirky smirky Jaime Alexander as Sif from the trailers, but... that cast, man, the cast is amazing. Even the people I've never heard of. Especially the people I've never heard of. Tom Hiddleston's Loki was far and away the best there. It was basically "Loki: With Some Other People Supporting." But back to Idris Elba: you should see my gleeful trollface at all the racists raging at casting a black man as a Norse god. So many angry racists! Hee. ♥

Final Note: At least two dudely commenters at io9 reignited my faith in humanity for pointing out that Thor passes the Bechdel test (something fewer and fewer movies have done since the Bechdel test came out).